Thursday, March 22, 2012
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
This makes me realise that my life is more like a series of longings for something or the other. Last year at the end of February I was longing for coming to Belgium. When I was finally here, I longed for our Christmas break to go back to India. After the Christmas break here I am, yearning for the China Trip and going back to India for being together with Sid. I am sure the craving would be for something else after I have lived these two experiences. Do we ever get satisfied and live completely, uncomplainingly in the moment? Or is it just me? I like to imagine that when I will live with Sid and we would have the careers of our choice and live in the country of our dreams, I will long no more and be unquestioningly satisfied and sickeningly happy. But is that true? Would there be something else to crave for then? Babies, perhaps? I don't know, I am just guessing!
The thing is that why can't I just be happy in the moment. Not that I am not happy, but there is just this endless longing and waiting. After all I am now living the life for which I was counting days a year back. Why then, am I waiting for this time to just fly by? Perhaps because I believe that I have more exciting things to look forward to. I am thankful that I have such a life at the moment, that every time I have newer and better things to look forward to, but I should also be able to completely live the experience that I wished for in a not so distant past. Isn't this insulting to that 'someone' up there who grants our wishes if we just keep desiring for more and better?
Is it just normal human nature or is it the paranoia of someone who can never be satisfied? Am I just human or am I insane? Or am I being insane right now by blogging my useless (?) reflections when I have to study for the frightening Corporate Finance exam?
Friday, January 8, 2010
Saturday, December 12, 2009
No matter where you are in the world, there's one feeling that stays the same across cultures and countries. The feeling that you get when exams are over!!
I used to feel the same way in High School, in Engineering, and now even in MBA. All my classmates here feel the same way. That feeling of relief, and of having all the time in the world to do whatever you please. Right after the last exam, a Chilean classmate mentioned to me, "Now I have an appointment with my pillow!" And I smiled.
So, the first part of our MBA is done, that constitues one-third of the program. I don't want to comment on how I did in the exams, they are over, and that's a relief. We have a 4 day residential seminar starting from 15th December and then holidays!! Wooohoooo!!!
I shopped last evening and realised how beautiful the streets looked because of all the decorations for Christmas. I hadn't been out of my studio and school since last some days, and hadn't realised that the Christmas season is already upon us.
I am counting days for going back to India. While eating pizza last night for dinner, I almost cried thinking of Mom's cooking and all the food that I will eat when I reach home. I am tired of the Belgian, Thai and Turkish food here and even of my own cooking. I know that I will hog and gain weight at home, but who cares!
Siddharth has booked his tickets for Delhi and I can't wait to see him again. This will only be the second time since we have grown up that I will meet him! Sounds unbelievable even to myself, but it's true. Surprisingly, I never feel that I have met him just once. Perhaps because I know him since I was a 6 year old and because I see him on Skype everyday. When I tell our little story to my women friends here, they get the shock of their lives. "You have met him just once since you grew up! And you really started talking to each other only six months back, out of which you have been in Belgium for four months! Are you sure you want to marry him???" If I use all that logic, I know I would never suggest someone else to do what I am doing. But truly, I have never been so sure of anything in my life. Yes, I do want to marry him :)
Ah! It's time to get ready and head to the shopping streets! It's Christmas season and I wanna shop!!
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Saturday, October 31, 2009
If I ever had any doubts about the ability of time to fly, they have been put to rest now. It's been only some time that I came to Belgium, and I am already booking tickets for Delhi and looking forward to my winter vacation. Yeah folks, I will be in Delhi for Christmas and New Year's! I can't wait for it and guess what I am missing most in Leuven?? South Indian Food! Yeah, that's surprising for me too. Not family, not friends, not 'ghar ka khana', but I am missing good old Idli, Sambhar and Dosa here. Would anybody believe that? Maybe because that is the only thing that I could not find here at all so far. I am regularly in touch with family and friends, I cook my own 'Indian' meals but Idli-Sambhar is something that is just not to be found in our little town :(
We don't have any classes for this entire week and I am enjoying the break. Talking for hours with Siddharth, cleaning every minute inch of my studio, listening to songs, cooking nice meals etc. Of course I will also catch up on all the subjects where I am lagging behind and prepare for projects and exams, but that is secondary priority for this week.
Our classes have been progressing at a break-neck speed as usual and I did not even realise when subjects like Leadership, Human Resource Management, Corporate Social Responsibility, Business and Law, and Entrepreneurship zoomed past us. The learning in each was immense and I am in awe of most of our professors here. For example, our Business and Law professor started the course with us by distributing some cases and questions to test our ethics and knowledge about Law. In the first class he told us jokingly that the purpose of his course was to keep us out of jail. The entire class laughed but when he discussed our answers to the cases and questions, we realised how unethical, hypocritical and unaware of the Law we were. If we indeed did those things in real corporate world, we would have been put in jail, and all the while we thought that we were being fair!! I do believe my professor's joke now and realise how difficult ethical choices are in the real world. Wow, I am already beginning to talk like an MBA!
Diwali came and went and I did not light a single cracker. I badly missed home during Diwali but thankfully I have very nice classmates. A chinese classmate called us home for tea on Diwali afternoon and we had dinner at an Indian friend's place. His wife had prepared a delicious Indian meal for us, which we ate while watching the classic 'Jaane Bhi Do Yaaro'. We also played cards, because Diwali without gambling is utterly boring. I explained the concept of Diwali to many of our classmates who wanted to know the story behind the festival and why and how we celebrate it. I hope I gave them the correct version of the story, but anyway they would never know the difference :)
On the day after Diwali we visited a Krishna temple called Radhadesh in Ardenne. It is a beautiful place with rolling hills and dense forests. After the prayer ceremony at the temple we took a walk in the woods and it felt like going back to nature and connecting with the Supreme.
The second pic is of the castle in which the temple is situated.
I hope that after this one week break, I will emerge refreshed and full of energy, specially because it is Autumn and it is so beautiful here. I love taking walks in the park close to my studio and will post pics of the beautiful park soon.